According to Becoming Frum, there are three main reasons as to why someone who is FFB may hesitate to marry someone who is BT. First, there is the fear that the BT person may back out of his or her choice to become Orthodox after the marriage is completed. Second, the children will be presented with the "confusing" factor that the BT's grandparents aren't a part of the Orthodox culture at all. Third, the BT won't have any kind of pedigree showing some kind of lineage within the community. To these reasons for hesitance, I have a few questions/criticisms.
The first, being afraid to marry someone because the FFB is afraid the BT might back out, is completely understandable. A lot of lifestyle changes need to be put into place, and become habit before Orthodoxy can really become a part of that person's daily routine. Often, a person might idealize a certain lifestyle, but eventually may find that they aren't compatible.
The second, however, I find to be quite ridiculous. At a certain point, when able to understand basic differences in faith a cultures. The parents can sit down with the child, and explain that the BT parent decided to take his/her life in a different religious direction than it was going. "While grandma and grandpa may be Jewish, they never decided to take their lives in the Orthodox direction. Nonetheless, they are still your grandparents, and they still love you very much."
The third, placing such importance on lineage and name, is something I understand to be a very traditional belief system. However, I can't agree with how heavily you can place someone's name with his or her ability to be a fit parent, spouse, or religious person. Granted, their household may have provided the necessary tools to being all of those things, but has not determined if those tools will be used in creating a happy home.
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